The Afghan Footballer

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Sent: 09 January 2012 09:53
To: TTMMC
Subject: FW: The Afghan Footballer
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Bank Robbery …..

A man goes into a bank and robs it. On escaping he is cornered by the Police, and takes three hostages, two men and a woman.

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The Dangers of Hunting …..

A couple of Irishmen are out hunting in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his mobile phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”

There is a silence, and then a shot is heard.

The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?”

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Iron Deficiency …..

One day, a country mother decided to take her 3 sons to the doctor to discover why they had been sick so much as of late. The doctor, upon examining them, told the mother the sons lacked iron in their diet. Not completely understanding what the doctor had told her, she began to mix small iron ball bearings into her sons’ food.

About a day after the new regime of iron had begun, one of the sons confronted his mother. “Ma! You won’t believe this!” He said. “What?” his Mother inquired. “Well,” he began, “I was going to pee, and all the sudden, I passed a ball bearing!” The mother nodded. “Yes,” She said, “I know, I put iron ball bearings in your food because the doctor told me of your iron deficiency.” “Oh..” The boy said, “that explains a lot…” and the boy scampered off.

Another day passed when another of the Mother’s sons came to speak with her. “Ma! You won’t believe this!” “What?” his Mother inquired. “Well,” he began, “I went to take a crap, and all the sudden, I passed a ball bearing!” The mother nodded. “Yes,” She said, “I already explained this to your brother; I put iron ball bearings in your food because the doctor told me of your iron deficiency.” “Oh…” The boy said, “That would explain it…” and the boy scampered off.

The next day, the Mother’s remaining son came to talk to her. “Ma!” He screamed, “You are never going to believe what just happened!” “Let me guess,” His mother said, “you went to the bathroom and out popped a ball bearing, right?”

“No…” The boy began, “I was out in the barn jacking off and I shot the dog!”