Don’t always do exactly as you’re told

I was at a party last night and the DJ played “Sit Down” by James, so we all sat down.

He then played “Jump Around” by House of Pain, so we all jumped around.

Then he played Dexys Midnight Runners “Come on Eileen”. Continue reading

One Dieing Wish

A nun gets onto a bus, which is empty apart from her and the driver.

She says, “I’m going to die soon, but I want to have sex before I do. I must remain a virgin, so it shall have to be anal, I can’t commit adultery, so the man must be single, can you fulfil my wish?”

“Yes”, says the drive, and eagerly carries out the nuns wish.

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Saying the right thing …..

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn’t taste like alcohol at all. He didn’t even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.

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