Parenting Tip

Pulling Faces

Birthday Treat

 

1 New Text Message.

The Afghan Footballer

From: ________ , _______
Sent: 09 January 2012 09:53
To: TTMMC
Subject: FW: The Afghan Footballer

Potato Peeler

I couldn’t find the damn thing that peels the carrots and potatoes, so I asked the kids if they’d seen it.

The many uses of Dough.

A teacher asks her class to make a sentence using the word dough.

Little  Alice says, “In Italy they make pizza out of special dough”. Excellent says the teacher.

Little Mary says, “My brother makes dinosaurs out of playdough”. Well done says the teacher.

Little Johnny raises his hand, “Yes Johnny, what do you want to say?” asks the teacher.

The Robot Lie Detector

John was a salesman’s delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change.

One day John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late.

‘Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?’ asked John.

‘Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project,’ said Tommy.

The robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.

Tim to the Rescue …..

Teacher asks “Tim, why is your cat at school today?”

Insects …..

A boy and his father were playing ball in the front yard when the boy saw a honeybee. He ran over and stomped it.

“Don’t do that, that was a honeybee,” his father said, “he wasn’t doing anything to you. For killing him you will do without honey for a week.”