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The Nun and the Fig Leaf …..

A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters restaurant.

The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while the lights would turn off. Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent. She walked up to the bartender, and asked, “May I please use the restroom?”

The bartender replied, “OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf.”

“Well, in that case, I’ll just look the other way,” said the nun.

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Upset …..

A couple had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband insisted on shutting off the light.

Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him of this crazy habit.

So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights. She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device… A vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one.

She went completely ballistic. “You impotent bastard,” she screamed at him, “How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!”

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