My attractive Chinese naeighbour called around the other day. I let her in and asked her what was up.

She said, “Could you help me please?” I replied of course, what do you need?

She replied, “I desperateley need a Roger”.

Thinking my luck was in i smiled and said, “No problem there”.

But as i began to unbuckle my trousers she began to scream. Continue reading

The Vicar …..

A vicar and his friend are playing golf.

His friend misses a three foot putt and says, “Damn! missed the bugger!”

The vicar is shocked by his language and tells him that God will strike him down if he keeps on cursing.

Continue reading

Women’s English …..

  • Yes = No
  • No = Yes
  • Maybe = No
  • We need = I want
  • I am sorry = you’ll be sorry
  • We need to talk = you’re in trouble
  • Sure, go ahead = you better not
  • Do what you want = you will pay for this later
  • I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron!
  • You’re very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?
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