A guy walks into a bar with his pet turtle in his hand. The bartender takes a look at the turtle and sees that its all scratched up, duct tape on its shell and a brace around its neck.
The guy takes a look under the bar and sees that the bartender has a springer spaniel. So the guy says to the bartender, “I’ll bet you $50 that my turtle can beat your dog in a race.”
The bartender looks again at the beaten up turtle and says, “Look, man, there’s no way! That turtle doesn’t stand a chance.” But the man insisted and the bartender took the bet thinking it would be an easy $50.
The guy counted down from 5, “5, 4, 3, 2, 1…”
When he yelled go, the bartender released his dog right as the guy chucked his turtle at the wall.
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